Three words: Chili. Cook. Off.
The following excerpt was tipsily typed on a Monday evening when I was scouring my brain for recipe inspiration. Yes – I do get tipsy from just one beer these days, typically post work out. You’re laughing now, but think about how much money I’m saving by being a light weight!
“ The real question is do I go for knock your socks off classic or try and be creative? No, I’m not going to make two kinds of chili. That’s absolutely absurd. Especially since I’m also making apple pie bars.
Oh.. there’s that jar of pineapple in the fridge. Dare I even tempt myself with the idea that I am going to make – PINEAPPLE chili?! I mean pineapple chili is definitely a thing, so you can totally throw all that stuff together in a magical crockpot with a bajillion spices and let it simmer for ages and you will get something that tastes good, right? “
That was Monday night. So, where did this get me? Tuesday evening I stopped at the grocery store after my spin class to pick up some ingredients. Aside from wanting an entire pint of coconut ice cream, I bee lined for the usual – kidney beans, black beans, etc. Then, inspiration came from none other than – my favorite pizza. Pizza… chilli… minus some dough it’s basically the same thing.
Every time I go to Pizza Luce, I get The Rustler with their rinotta cheese substitute. Direct from their website is this:
” The vegetarian version of the chop lickin, chap wearin’ little doggie. She’s a silent little smoker on the side, without the chirp-chirp. Topped with mock duck, pineapple, banana peppers, red onion, cheddar and mozzarella on our BBQ/red sauce. Cowgirl approved! ”
Now, I have no idea what that first part is about other than talking about little doggies. All I know is that I’m on a chili mission to get rid of the jar of angry pineapple in my fridge and this is the answer. And BBQ sauce, because I’m all about that life.
So like, sub banana peppers for regular peppers in a standard chili recipe plus some beans, pineapple, and BBQ sauce, and you’re good to go. That was my game plan. Oh crap, where do you even get mock duck? Cue google search.
Apparently Minneapolis, MN is the mock duck capital of the US, according to the surly vegan. So then I was like “I don’t even know how to prepare mock duck let alone feel like I should feed it to a bunch of people”. Soy-rizo it is. And, Trader Joe’s doesn’t have banana peppers so jalapeños were looking like the next best thing.
Before you go run off and make this chili, take note of a few things.
1) This won the “creative” category at the chili cook out off I took it to over the weekend. That being said, it’s not going to beat a standard veggie chili on just flavor because it is a bit sweeter than your standard chili.
2) This chili follows the “triple s” profile. Okay, I totally made that up but general comments were that it was spicy, smokey, and a little sweet. I added only a 1/2 cup of BBQ sauce and you could easily half that amount if you’re concerned about it being too sweet.
3) The longer this cooks, the better. I found that the smokey characterizing flavor developed over time. I let this sit for about 8 hours on low, but you could easily achieve this cook level for 4 hours on high.
Servings: About 3 quarts
Time: 4 hours
- 14.5 oz can diced tomatoes
- 10 oz can diced tomatoes w/ green chilis
- 14.5 oz can black beans
- 14.5 oz can kidney beans
- 2 cups vegetable broth
- 12 oz soy chorizo, I get mine at Trader Joe’s
- 2 cloves garlic, minced
- 4 jalapeños, diced
- 1 red onion, diced
- 1/2 cup BBQ sauce
- 1/2 TBSP cumin
- 1/2 TBSP chili powder
- 1 tsp smoked paprika
- 2 TBSP olive oil (if not using a crock pot)
- If you are using a crockpot, this recipe is so easy it’s not even fair. You just throw everything into the crock pot and turn it on low for 8 hours. I recommend the low heat/long time option to develop the smokey flavor from BBQ but you can definitely just crank it on high for 4 hours. Give it a check every now and then for a stir, otherwise this recipe is pretty low maintenance.
- If you do not have a crock pot, you can also make this on the stove top. Heat olive oil in a 4 quart pot over medium heat. Add onions and garlic and sauté until onions begin to turn translucent, about 5-7 minutes. Add jalapeños and soy chorizo and cook for another 5 minutes, stirring occasionally.
- Add remaining ingredients and stir to combine. Bring mixture to boil and let sit for 3-4 hours. Check on that bad boy every 30 minutes or so just to give it a stir.
- Serve with cornbread or bring to your next chili cookout, you might even win real homemade maple syrup since you won most creative.